Change is Good

Here I sit, yet another week between posts. I've been struggling with the direction to go with my blog. In my mind, I see my blog as a windowed view into my life. The question is, does the window have blinders? For a long time, I feel like I've put filters on my posts based on "who might read this?", "what will they think if they do?", "will their opinion of me change?". I've come to the conclusion that this line of thinking has just killed my motivation to write anything at all.

You know what I've decided? Who the fuck cares. It's my blog, my thoughts, if someone reading it can't handle it, tough. It's who I am and that's all I know, and all I have to offer! So expect to see more posts 'round here. I might even change up the look and feel or... heaven forbid, even change my entire blog name!

In truth, the change to the blog isn't the only thing I'm needing to make. I've been struggling with motivation in other areas as well, particularly my running. The status quo worked for the weight loss, but it's becoming painfully obvious that staying motivated during "maintaining weight" is a much bigger mental challenge.

Finally, I need to make changes in other areas as well. From working on getting Megan to bed at a normal time (i.e. not 11pm), to getting to bed at a normal time myself. I've been staying up until midnight a LOT lately, which I know is not healthy. Just because I CAN handle staying up until midnight, doesn't mean I SHOULD be. I know that it effects my mood, which then effects my decisions, usually resulting in bad decisions. (i.e. not exercising, over eating, or spending too much time on World of Warcraft).

In the spirit of change, I even did something different at work today. Someone I work with has, in my opinion, put in a lot of effort recently. Practically doing the work of 2-3 people. I decided to make sure this effort was noticed and wrote up an "employee recognition" email to my boss. My little attempt to do something without my own interests in mind.

Have to cut this short, dinner is ready!!!