4-day weekend over already? Not surprising, plenty of stuff to keep me busy. Not to mention work calling me Friday night making me do work from home. But let's not get into that shall we?
Back in April, I started some "In-Depth" posts (Running & Work), and I had fully planned on keeping them going but wasn't motivated to get more up in May. So I thought I'd try to do one before June is over and then maybe shoot for 2 more in July. Topic for today? Food and eating!
I have a shitty relationship with food, that much is a given. Like so many other things, it is hard for me to enjoy food (and specifically 'bad' food) in moderation. The best I can do is not buy certain things or keep them in my house. That's only one skirmish in the larger battle of staying away from unhealthy food.
There are a few contributing factors to areas of my unhealthy eating, but most of it all boils down to willpower and a lack of pressing need to change my eating habits. Obviously, a large amount of my eating is healthy. I've developed some routines that keep me in check: healthy oatmeal breakfast every day, packed lunch at work every day, and healthy family evening meals. Some of the problems come when I have to break away from the weekly routine. Other areas are controlling my evening meal portions (eating every ones leftovers), not snacking in the evenings, and not eating badly on the weekends.
The stupid part is that with all my running, I can afford to eat unhealthy (from a calorie intake stand point). My laboratory measured resting metabolic rate was 1,886 calories. On any given run, I'm burning between 900-2,200 calories. Running 5 days a week means that on average, I can consume 3,000-3,400 calories daily without breaking a sweat (pun intended). Yikes, do you have any idea how much bad food you can get away with eating with that many spare calories?
The killer part of that whole equation is a form of Catch-22. Am I eating more because my body needs the additional calories from running more? Or am I running more so that I can eat more? Or am I simply eating more because I can? And this is where the willpower part fails, because regardless of the answer, I should still focus on healthy calories. More fruits, vegetables, simple carbs and proteins, and less hot dogs, processed frozen foods, and random snacking on sugary/salty foods.
So what is the answer? Practically every Monday for the last year, I've said to myself, okay today I will make a change and stop snacking on random bad food. And almost every Monday by noon, my resolve has shattered as someone brings in a random left over cake from some weekend celebration (and even I've brought one in before!). I think the only answer is the one I've been unwilling to face: all or nothing. Time to put my money where my mouth is, and own up to my daily decisions and make a change. Wish me luck!
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Fallacy of Potential
Running 2 miles worth of strideouts (and 8 miles total) in 90 degree weather is a good way to get yourself killed. But that didn't stop me from doing it, or from feeling like a total bad ass when I was finished. Sure, my heart felt like it might bust out of my chest, but that just means I'm that much more manly, right?
During my insane levels of physical exertion today, I started thinking about limits. More specifically, I was thinking about my limits, and how I'm always trying to push myself beyond my capabilities (and not just physical in nature). This lead me to thinking about the word "potential" and a phrase I hate, "full potential".
Why do I hate that phrase you ask? Because it is meaningless. The word potential is an adjective, meaning it has to be used to describe something else. In physics, you don't talk about the "potential" of mass. You talk about it's potential energy. The same concept holds true when talking about your own potential. Potential for what? Potential to be a good father? Potential to eat an entire pizza? Potential to run until you collapse? Don't use the phrase "reaching full potential" unless you at least augment it with a point of reference.
The whole concept of potential is hogwash anyway. Having the POTENTIAL to do anything is meaningless, what matters is the DOING. You can potentially do anything all day, and still not accomplish anything. I could potentially become president some day. But surprise! That's not going to happen. My suspicion is that the most successful, and probably most content/happy people don't even think about what their full potential might be. They are out there DOING exactly what they are capable of doing, and the concept of wondering what their potential might be, is most likely foreign to them.
For the record, I wasn't always like this. Lazy used to be my middle name and I made a full time job out of procrastination. For whatever reason, as part of my overall transformation over the last few years, I just can no longer do that. If I see something that needs doing, I do it. If I think of something I want to achieve, I set out for it. I've stopped bothering to worry about what if's, and just go for it, and see what happens. I find life to be much more fun that way.
During my insane levels of physical exertion today, I started thinking about limits. More specifically, I was thinking about my limits, and how I'm always trying to push myself beyond my capabilities (and not just physical in nature). This lead me to thinking about the word "potential" and a phrase I hate, "full potential".
Why do I hate that phrase you ask? Because it is meaningless. The word potential is an adjective, meaning it has to be used to describe something else. In physics, you don't talk about the "potential" of mass. You talk about it's potential energy. The same concept holds true when talking about your own potential. Potential for what? Potential to be a good father? Potential to eat an entire pizza? Potential to run until you collapse? Don't use the phrase "reaching full potential" unless you at least augment it with a point of reference.
The whole concept of potential is hogwash anyway. Having the POTENTIAL to do anything is meaningless, what matters is the DOING. You can potentially do anything all day, and still not accomplish anything. I could potentially become president some day. But surprise! That's not going to happen. My suspicion is that the most successful, and probably most content/happy people don't even think about what their full potential might be. They are out there DOING exactly what they are capable of doing, and the concept of wondering what their potential might be, is most likely foreign to them.
For the record, I wasn't always like this. Lazy used to be my middle name and I made a full time job out of procrastination. For whatever reason, as part of my overall transformation over the last few years, I just can no longer do that. If I see something that needs doing, I do it. If I think of something I want to achieve, I set out for it. I've stopped bothering to worry about what if's, and just go for it, and see what happens. I find life to be much more fun that way.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Long Week
This was the first time in a month that I actually had to be at work all 5 days. Thankfully I survived, and next week I'm only doing a 3-day week! Nice. Aside from work, I did a couple of hot runs, and not much else. Megan was at the YMCA day camp all week, that I mentioned before. Despite having a few days of rain, she absolutely loved her time there. It was even more fun because she attented with two neighbor girls that she is friends with.
Today we hit up the Zoo, which was an awesome decision. The weather was so perfect outside, that we didn't even go inside the entire time we were at the zoo. We parked, walked through one of the outdoor enterences, and then went straight to the Zoo Farm. Casey had such a great time in the petting Zoo. I thought she might be a little scared, but she was fearless and loved touching and going up to all the goats.
Not sure what we are doing for Fathers Day tomorrow, but it will probably involve a brunch somewhere. The problem is where? Need to find a place that won't be too insanely busy as to require an hour wait, but have good enough food and service so that we can enjoy it. My brother was saying this new place in town called Wild Bill's was having a brunch thing, but I just got done reading a ton of horrible reviews. Hmmm... anyone got any suggestions? I got a few hours to decide...
Today we hit up the Zoo, which was an awesome decision. The weather was so perfect outside, that we didn't even go inside the entire time we were at the zoo. We parked, walked through one of the outdoor enterences, and then went straight to the Zoo Farm. Casey had such a great time in the petting Zoo. I thought she might be a little scared, but she was fearless and loved touching and going up to all the goats.
Not sure what we are doing for Fathers Day tomorrow, but it will probably involve a brunch somewhere. The problem is where? Need to find a place that won't be too insanely busy as to require an hour wait, but have good enough food and service so that we can enjoy it. My brother was saying this new place in town called Wild Bill's was having a brunch thing, but I just got done reading a ton of horrible reviews. Hmmm... anyone got any suggestions? I got a few hours to decide...
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
NOSUP4U
I saw that (blog title) on a license plate driving home from work today. Seriously? You like a TV show reference enough to use that as a license plate? Now, don't get me wrong. I'm all about custom license plates. In fact, I've had two in my life so far. They were uber cheap out in Idaho, like $25 bucks.
The first custom plate I had was "DEIMOS1", which sorta sucked because someone already had "DEIMOS". Deimos is better known in Greek mythology as the god of fear, dread and terror. It is also (lesser known) as the first Quake Clan that I joined, and ultimately helped lead/organize the years of 95-98. You can still Google up some hold history on that Clan, including this little nugget I found. Some of the names of people mentioned in that list were long time friends. That was the peak of my time playing Quake, where our clan even beat the likes of "Thresh", who made millions playing video games and even has his own Wiki page. While a part of Clan Deimos, I went by the name NightShade, an online handle I had used since I was 15.
The second custom plate I had was "GRIMDAR", which if you didn't notice by now is the URL of this blog as well. Grimdar Hillmover, to give the full name, was my persona in the online game Everquest. My profile picture? That's artwork someone did for me of my online dwarf character. I've posted before about the time I spent in that game, and there is even an official record of it on the interwebs, 365 days 19 hours 55 minutes. I've never mentioned what exactly I did during that time. For the majority of the time, I was a Guild leader, meaning I had to organize and orchestrate online raids, bringing together 40-70 people, to work together to achieve goals. My more enjoyable memories are the numerous conventions I went to where I met all these people in person, that I spent so many hours with online. Those were some great times, parties, and events I'll never forget.
It's weird looking back on that time in my life, where a video game was so important to me. Where work and home life were just things that got in the way of that next online challenge. The scary part is that no matter how much I try to deny it, there is always going to be a small part of me that misses it. When I think about what exactly it is that I missed, it's boils down pretty quickly to one thing. I was somebody important. I was a "leader", I was respected, and people honestly looked up to me. Whether it was my skills in Quake or my strategic planning in Everquest. People knew who I was, and in my own little world/mind, I was famous.
I remember very well walking around one of the Everquest conventions with my little name tag around my neck, and someone came up to me, so excited to meet the actual Grimdar. They related a long story about how I went out of my way one day to help them out and they never forgot. It's probably the closest I'll ever feel to being a celebrity. And it was a good feeling, and one that is not easily forgotten.
The first custom plate I had was "DEIMOS1", which sorta sucked because someone already had "DEIMOS". Deimos is better known in Greek mythology as the god of fear, dread and terror. It is also (lesser known) as the first Quake Clan that I joined, and ultimately helped lead/organize the years of 95-98. You can still Google up some hold history on that Clan, including this little nugget I found. Some of the names of people mentioned in that list were long time friends. That was the peak of my time playing Quake, where our clan even beat the likes of "Thresh", who made millions playing video games and even has his own Wiki page. While a part of Clan Deimos, I went by the name NightShade, an online handle I had used since I was 15.
The second custom plate I had was "GRIMDAR", which if you didn't notice by now is the URL of this blog as well. Grimdar Hillmover, to give the full name, was my persona in the online game Everquest. My profile picture? That's artwork someone did for me of my online dwarf character. I've posted before about the time I spent in that game, and there is even an official record of it on the interwebs, 365 days 19 hours 55 minutes. I've never mentioned what exactly I did during that time. For the majority of the time, I was a Guild leader, meaning I had to organize and orchestrate online raids, bringing together 40-70 people, to work together to achieve goals. My more enjoyable memories are the numerous conventions I went to where I met all these people in person, that I spent so many hours with online. Those were some great times, parties, and events I'll never forget.
It's weird looking back on that time in my life, where a video game was so important to me. Where work and home life were just things that got in the way of that next online challenge. The scary part is that no matter how much I try to deny it, there is always going to be a small part of me that misses it. When I think about what exactly it is that I missed, it's boils down pretty quickly to one thing. I was somebody important. I was a "leader", I was respected, and people honestly looked up to me. Whether it was my skills in Quake or my strategic planning in Everquest. People knew who I was, and in my own little world/mind, I was famous.
I remember very well walking around one of the Everquest conventions with my little name tag around my neck, and someone came up to me, so excited to meet the actual Grimdar. They related a long story about how I went out of my way one day to help them out and they never forgot. It's probably the closest I'll ever feel to being a celebrity. And it was a good feeling, and one that is not easily forgotten.
Friday, June 11, 2010
Slow Blog Week
There wasn't much going on this week, and I couldn't find the time to blog. Instead, I found the time to use one of the new templates available on blogger. I had been thinking about a new look lately, and I like how this turned out. I didn't like how my header graphic looked, so I just removed it for now. I'll be trying to find some new header image to put up there. It's just way to plain right now.
I was off work today, because I always try to take one off around my birthday, mostly as a present for myself. Tomorrow is my actual birthday, and oddly enough, we have absolutely no plans. Maybe I'll just find a way to pass the day away with video games. I haven't mentioned it before, but I currently have my brothers XBox 360.
Today is also special for a different reason, as it marks the anniversary of my blog. This is going to be my 5th year of blogging, which is quite a long time. I never thought I would have kept it up this long, but here I am! People talk about blogs and blogging as if they are the "fax" of the internet. Meaning completely outdated, serving no purpose, and "Who the hell still blogs?". Me baby, me. Screw you Facebook and Twitter.
We decided to take the girls over to Edinborough Park, which is kind of funny. Because apparently it has been exactly one year since I took Megan last, which was one year before that. So... at least we're consistent?
This evening, we attended a free concert at a local park we go to often. They are doing free concerts every Friday night for the rest of the summer, so we will probably go to a bunch of them since it's just down the road. There was supposed to be food vendors, but a bunch backed out at the last minute because they were afraid of bad weather. But it turned out to be a very nice night for playing in the park while listening to music.
Here are some videos from today. First up, we have Megan and I shooting baskets.
And another video, this one of Casey dancing along to the live band doing the song, "Secret Agent Man". This song will forever make me think of Chuck E Cheese.
I was off work today, because I always try to take one off around my birthday, mostly as a present for myself. Tomorrow is my actual birthday, and oddly enough, we have absolutely no plans. Maybe I'll just find a way to pass the day away with video games. I haven't mentioned it before, but I currently have my brothers XBox 360.
Today is also special for a different reason, as it marks the anniversary of my blog. This is going to be my 5th year of blogging, which is quite a long time. I never thought I would have kept it up this long, but here I am! People talk about blogs and blogging as if they are the "fax" of the internet. Meaning completely outdated, serving no purpose, and "Who the hell still blogs?". Me baby, me. Screw you Facebook and Twitter.
We decided to take the girls over to Edinborough Park, which is kind of funny. Because apparently it has been exactly one year since I took Megan last, which was one year before that. So... at least we're consistent?
This evening, we attended a free concert at a local park we go to often. They are doing free concerts every Friday night for the rest of the summer, so we will probably go to a bunch of them since it's just down the road. There was supposed to be food vendors, but a bunch backed out at the last minute because they were afraid of bad weather. But it turned out to be a very nice night for playing in the park while listening to music.
Here are some videos from today. First up, we have Megan and I shooting baskets.
And another video, this one of Casey dancing along to the live band doing the song, "Secret Agent Man". This song will forever make me think of Chuck E Cheese.
Saturday, June 05, 2010
Rainy Day Fun
We did our best to make lemonade out lemons today, as we had all these out door activities planned and it was raining on and off all day. Started the morning out with a visit to the YMCA Day Camp Streefland. Megan is going there in two weeks for a week long day camp, and they were having an open house so I thought it would be a good time to just visit and get her excited about going. It worked out well and we had a great time and a free lunch of hot dogs.
After that, we headed over to Primrose, where Megan attended for a month last year. I never talked about it much at the time, but basically we needed some extra help that month and daycare provided us with that. Primrose was also having an open house, and they have the BEST open houses. Once again, they didn't disappoint. Bouncers, petting zoo, pony rides, kids ferris wheel, face painting, and more food. They did take money for "tickets" but it was super cheap, and I had no problem doing that.
In other news, something cool that occurred recently that I didn't even mention. Megan has officially graduated from ECFE speech class! Not that I didn't think she wouldn't, but it was great to get that stamp of approval from the professionals. They put her through all sorts of tests, not just language and speech related, and she did fine on everything. I have absolutely no regrets of removing TV from my house, even if it wasn't a factor in her improvements, I'm sure it didn't hurt.
At 2 and 1/2, we were just getting Megan to say a few words and had started in on sign language. At 1 year, Casey knows well over 10-12 signs, and can already ask for the things she wants (through non-verbal communication). I've learned the hard way how much of an impact parents have on their kids in the early years. I can freely admit that I failed Megan in the early years of her development, and I have no problems owning up to that. And to anyone that might try to sugar coat it, or try and tell me kids can develop at different rates, I will gladly call bullshit, because I've experienced first hand what a difference we as parents can make for our kids.
If there is one thing I have learned, is that making mistakes is always the best way to improve yourself. How come I can never seem to just skip the first part, and not make the mistakes in the first place?
After that, we headed over to Primrose, where Megan attended for a month last year. I never talked about it much at the time, but basically we needed some extra help that month and daycare provided us with that. Primrose was also having an open house, and they have the BEST open houses. Once again, they didn't disappoint. Bouncers, petting zoo, pony rides, kids ferris wheel, face painting, and more food. They did take money for "tickets" but it was super cheap, and I had no problem doing that.
In other news, something cool that occurred recently that I didn't even mention. Megan has officially graduated from ECFE speech class! Not that I didn't think she wouldn't, but it was great to get that stamp of approval from the professionals. They put her through all sorts of tests, not just language and speech related, and she did fine on everything. I have absolutely no regrets of removing TV from my house, even if it wasn't a factor in her improvements, I'm sure it didn't hurt.
At 2 and 1/2, we were just getting Megan to say a few words and had started in on sign language. At 1 year, Casey knows well over 10-12 signs, and can already ask for the things she wants (through non-verbal communication). I've learned the hard way how much of an impact parents have on their kids in the early years. I can freely admit that I failed Megan in the early years of her development, and I have no problems owning up to that. And to anyone that might try to sugar coat it, or try and tell me kids can develop at different rates, I will gladly call bullshit, because I've experienced first hand what a difference we as parents can make for our kids.
If there is one thing I have learned, is that making mistakes is always the best way to improve yourself. How come I can never seem to just skip the first part, and not make the mistakes in the first place?
Tuesday, June 01, 2010
Insane Luck
Apparently running during rush hour in the suburbs is a bad idea. I drove home expecting to hit the treadmill due to rain, but by the time I got near the house, the rain had let up. So instead, I went into the gym to change and go running outside, between 4:30pm - 5:30pm.
I was almost hit at stop sign intersections three times. Each time the person was totally clueless and coasts right into the crosswalk section of the stop sign in question. Once I had to completely stop or get hit, and the guy finally looks up and notices me. I'm standing there with my arms up in a questioning manner, as if to say, "WTF dude?". His window was down, and he goes, "Oh sorry buddy."
This just made me even more angry, because it made me think of the Dane cook skit, where he talks about people calling you Pal or Buddy that are clearly not your buddy. Fast forward to 3:45, and you'll see what I'm talking about. I kept my mouth shut and continued on. I finished the run and made it home safe. But I think I'll be keeping my after work runs to paths and lakes, and no more rush hour sidewalk running.
I was almost hit at stop sign intersections three times. Each time the person was totally clueless and coasts right into the crosswalk section of the stop sign in question. Once I had to completely stop or get hit, and the guy finally looks up and notices me. I'm standing there with my arms up in a questioning manner, as if to say, "WTF dude?". His window was down, and he goes, "Oh sorry buddy."
This just made me even more angry, because it made me think of the Dane cook skit, where he talks about people calling you Pal or Buddy that are clearly not your buddy. Fast forward to 3:45, and you'll see what I'm talking about. I kept my mouth shut and continued on. I finished the run and made it home safe. But I think I'll be keeping my after work runs to paths and lakes, and no more rush hour sidewalk running.
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